of 222 political prisoners
Ex-prisoners who were forced into exile by the Ortega regime share details about their first year in the US, surviving the after effects of prison
HAVANA TIMES – “This is not my country. What am I doing here?” Maria Esperanza Sanchez asked herself as she looked around in all directions in a U.S. city, a few days after being released from prison and stripped of her Nicaraguan citizenship on February 9, 2023, along with 221 other Nicaraguans, by orders of the Daniel Ortega-Rosario Murillo dictatorship. One year after that bittersweet release, the former prisoners in this first group of banished Nicaraguans continue to seek their way in a country that is completely alien to many of them.
There’s the problem of language, the need to find a job –any job–, find a place to live –and manage to pay the rent–, learn to get around, reinvent oneself, be able to feed oneself… and –in the middle of it all– deal with the physical and mental trauma of months and years in prison.
Some of the released prisoners have managed to reunite with one or more family members in the United States. Others have had to re-learn how to do everything, and on their own: different kinds of jobs from the ones they did in Nicaragua, living with strangers, learning to communicate in English, initiating immigration processes to achieve family reunification. The word they use to sum it up: “survival.”
CONFIDENCIAL spoke with former prisoners of conscience about their first year since being released from prison and banished from Nicaragua. Some say that if they had remained in prison, they might have died by now. The most optimistic of them hope to see Nicaragua freed from the dictatorship, but the most practical say that their basic needs and the struggle to be able to reunite with their loved ones are their priorities at the moment. Nostalgia constantly invades their consciousness, as do the nightmares of their days and nights in prison, the torture, the mistreatment.
Through first-person testimonies, these ex-prisoners recognize that forced exile is hard, but that it also represents a new beginning. These are their stories of resistance and survival.
“Instead of feeling overwhelmed that I’m old, I’ve tried to see the opportunities”
Evelyn Pinto Centeno, 64, spent 460 days in prison. She was incarcerated on November 6, 2021. She currently lives in Maryland and works as an educational facilitator. Her health suffered from her dictatorship-imposed imprisonment. During the first year of exile, her priority has been to recover her physical and emotional well-being. Settling in the U.S. has been challenging.
“One of the things that I’ve become aware of while being here in exile, without a pension, stripped of my nationality, with everything having been confiscated, is that I am already a senior citizen. I can’t believe it. I didn’t think of myself like that. Honestly, I didn’t think of myself that way until I entered prison and I realized how the other prisoners saw me: as an old woman.
“I had always been active in groups with peers who are just like me. We had all been friends since we were young and we always got together to do things for others. To now realize that I am now a retired, older woman – it only dawned on me when I got into a situation of vulnerability, of being imprisoned, and then expelled and forced into exile.
“This is something I’ve been working on with my therapist. I had to work on my self-confidence, doing things little by little. The issue of getting a job was important in that regard, even more than because of the income a job might represent. It allowed me to be active, to learn new things.
“Among the 222 there are quite a few older adults. There’s been a lot of emphasis on this. It’s like suddenly you look at yourself again and say, “Yes, I am part of that group.”
“This has helped me a lot to become aware of what my limitations are, the things I should be careful when doing, the things I should not do. But the most important thing is that I have the willingness to learn. In that sense I consider myself a fast learner. I have no problems with technology. I have connected well with the programs, with the different technologies that exist now such as social networks or online presentations. That has made me feel a sense of renewal.
“Instead of feeling stagnant or overwhelmed that I am old, that I am sick, that I am exiled… instead of ruminating about my misfortunes, I have tried to see the opportunities that being here is offering me. I try to be optimistic, to thank God for everything: for freedom, for being alive, for being well, for being with my family.
“I think the hardest thing for me [in prison] was the fear that my body could start to progressively and rapidly deteriorate. I have chronic renal disease, which could lead to renal failure in the end. I am in that previous stage, I am at level four. There are five levels. When I entered [prison] I was at level three.
“My doctor always told me: “Your blood pressure is fine, but if your blood pressure goes up, your kidneys will be affected. If your kidneys are affected, you’ll be entering the phase of renal failure.” That was what really marked my stay in prison, because that was my greatest fear.
“In prison they had me on a senior citizen plan. They took my blood pressure thre